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    Soul Mates - Destined, Chosen, or Created

    By Julia Simkin

    Are you disappointed that love isn't all rosy, pretty, happy, and bright. Are you frustrated that your soul mate doesn't understand you, nurture you, love you unconditionally, and spend 24/7 thinking about and catering to - who? - You? Are you wondering -- "What happened to my fairy tale? Where did I go wrong?"

    Well, if you answered yes to any of the questions above, I want you to know that your feelings and frustrations are absolutely understandable. And so is that little voice inside your head that's whispering "Just get rid of him and go find your real prince charming" ;-)

    But what if I told you that what you're actually doing is unknowingly sabotaging your love life and most importantly, your own happiness?

    Yes. Your own beliefs, as well as those that you've absorbed from the world around you, might just be preventing you from living the very fairy tale that you've been dreaming about.

    Think about it...

    Starting from the first moment we notice a difference between the sexes, we're trained to believe that there's only one true soul mate for us. We're hypnotized by the idea that only this individual (only this one soul mate!) will fulfill our lives and complete our destinies. We're convinced that it is this one soul mate that could make all of our troubles go away and is responsible for creating the blissful existence that we want.

    Sabotage? I think so!

    I realize that I haven't been around that long. But I have seen enough and lived through enough to realize that the beliefs we harbor within hearts don't necessarily represent the ultimate universal truth. Instead, they're probably acquired expectations from generations past that do very little to support the emotional fulfillment we desperately crave today.

    Let's imagine for a moment that our beliefs are based on incorrect assumptions. What if finding a soul mate isn't a predestined occurrence? What if choice and will also play a significant role in the outcome?

    What if we're meant to have more than one soul mate in a lifetime?

    What if a soul mate could actually be someone other than our mate?

    What if life isn't supposed to be rosy but transformational instead?

    What if our soul mate should be the one forcing us to grow and evolve (even if painful at times) rather than be the one who simply pets our mane?

    How would this information change your life?

    The answer is yours to keep...but my answer would is -- tremendously!

    Now what if I also told you that the sour-flavored relationship you're about to throw away could actually be transformed into the blossoming flower that you'e always envisioned? And with your current mate!


    Nope. Not fluff. It can be done.

    If you're open-minded and daring enough to challenge your current assumptions and are willing to consider the possibility that destiny might need a bit of help from you, you can create the soulful relationship that you've always desired.


    Well...have you ever heard of an astrological term - The Nodes of the Moon?

    If you haven't, that's ok. I'll explain.

    The nodes of the moon (south and north node) are two points in an astrological chart that possess priceless information about an individual's karmic past and soul-desired future. They symbolize the unique life path that each of us is on and can answer many questions about our own, as well as our partner's, inner struggles and desires -- answers that can transform not only our relationships, but also our lives.

    Here's an example

    1. Let's say you're constantly fighting with your mate about the fact that he's spending too much time trying to help other people with their problems instead of spending more time with you - often accusing him of not caring about you and not loving you enough.

    Now, what if you knew that your partner's north node was in the sign of Aquarius (placing his/her south node in the sign of Leo which is its opposite) and that part of his struggle/journey in life is to find a balance between his personal life and service to humanity? What if you found out that his attention to other causes actually had nothing to do with you but instead had everything to do with his soul mission in this life?

    How would this information change your relationship?

    Or let's say that his north node is in one of the other 11 sign positions? What might one of his life struggles be?

    Aries north node/Libra south node: assertion of singular identity versus self seen though partnership

    Taurus north node/Scorpio south node: stability and abundance versus power struggles, intensity, and destruction

    Gemini north node/Sagittarius south node: sophistication and blending into society versus crudeness and wildness

    Cancer north node/Capricorn south node: inner pride, responsibility, and status versus emotional openness, nurturance, and service

    Leo north node/Aquarius south node: strength of will to stand alone versus need for friendship and support of others

    Virgo north node/Pisces south node: crystallization and structured reality versus superstition and clouded fantasy

    Libra north node/Aries south node: self-sacrifice and cooperation versus self-assertion and closed-mindedness

    Scorpio north node/Taurus south node: acceptance of the transformational nature life (and himself) and ability to let go versus fear-based attachment to things, people, and beliefs

    Sagittarius north node/Gemini south node: understanding the value of loyalty and allegiance versus duality, indecision, and superficiality

    Capricorn north node/Cancer south node: responsibility, maturity, and adulthood versus immaturity, over-sensitivity, and over-dependence on others

    Pisces north node/Virgo south node: releasing dependence on structure, rigidity, and the physical plane and learning to accept the untouchable existence of a "higher authority" that extends beyond the five senses

    Just think of what this small piece of information can do for your relationship. You'll finally be able to understand why…

    And once you understand why, you'll most likely begin to fight less, blame less, and cry less.

    And instead.

    Love, embrace, and value more.

    So yes, maybe destiny did introduce you to your mate; but it's up to you to decide whether destiny's choice will also become your choice.

    The nodes can help you undress your mate's complex soul (as well as your own) so that you have a full deck of cards in front of you as you make your life-altering decision. Because believe me, you don't want to regret your decision, especially if it was based on an incomplete set of facts.

    I'm almost done - promise!

    There is just one more point that I need to mention -- the nodes are just one of the many valuable tools that can and should be used to strengthen a relationship. The disciplines available are numerous, but love being the fascinating and complex animal that it is, can probably benefit from all of them.

    Therefore, if you already have a trustworthy tool to use to support your strong, soulful union, please go ahead and use it. However, if you're curious and are interested in exploring another option, I offer you the nodes of the moon simply as additional food for thought.

    Well, I guess that's it. Just remember – be a bit patient and don't throw him away just yet!

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