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Romancing the Soul
True Stories of Soul Mates from around the World and Beyond
An Excerpt By Dorothy Thompson
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. - Aristotle
Snow White and Prince Charming. Romeo and Juliet. Beauty and the Beast. Harry and Sally. These are all names that come to mind when one thinks of the term soul mate. The ancient belief can be found in cultures the world over. But what does the term soul mate actually mean?
In the dictionary, "soul mate" means one of two persons compatible with each other in disposition, point of view or sensitivity; someone for whom you have a deep affinity. This explains the basic qualities, but we all know the soul mate theory goes much deeper than that.
According to Celtic wisdom, our souls begin their journey together as one being that becomes broken apart. Two souls emerge and move on into their life journeys. Perhaps we find our twin soul in this life. Maybe we find it in another life.
In order for our soul mate to appear, we must be ready for them. You will not meet your soul mate if you are still coming from a place of fear or jealousy in relationships. You couldn't run before you could walk, and you won't meet your soul mate before you are ready to learn what she/he has to teach you. In order to find our soul mate, we must be emotionally secure and know what we want from life.
THREE KINDS OF SOUL MATES
Did you know there are three main kinds of soul mates?
They are: Karmic, Companion and Twin Flames. Study the different kinds and discover which category your soul mate falls under. This will give you a broader understanding of why he or she has come into your life. To help you, I will explain the differences.
KARMIC SOUL MATE
The karmic soul mate experience is very common. You can have many of these in a lifetime. They enter your life to teach you an important lesson. Karmic soul mates can be co-workers, family members or close friends. One young woman particularly close to me comes to mind. Her name is Amanda Jane, and she is about twenty years my junior. She jokes that I must be her mother from another life. What makes our friendship special is that we touch on a spiritual level.
I often wonder why Amanda was brought into my life. We are very close, but what lesson am I to learn from her? To enjoy life again? Amanda comes from a dysfunctional family. Am I here to teach her a lesson? Am I to show her that she is loved and cherished? It can and does work both ways.
Sometimes karmic soul mate relationships can be romantic in nature; but if so, they won't last long. That is because these relationships are solely meant for learning lessons and for growth rather than for obtaining a life partner.
Another thing we must keep in mind is that not all karmic relationships are human. Sometimes, pets we consider to be special members of our family can display the same karmic characteristics as humans. An example of this is Avis Townsend's story "Back With Eli" in the karmic section of the book. Ms. Townsend's story shows there are special relationships we can have with our pets to the point where the bond between pet and human becomes so deep it's hard to dismiss it as anything other than the true karmic soul mate relationship.
Another point to remember about karmic soul mates, as well as other kinds of soul mates, is that each one, whether human or animal, comes into our lives for a reason and to teach us a lesson about ourselves.
COMPANION SOUL MATE
A companion soul mate relationship can be a relationship that is romantic in nature. It involves your wife/husband or someone you are intimate with. Oftentimes, these soul mates are not destined to be with us forever but, like Karmic soul mates, are brought into our lives for a purpose.
It is possible to spend a lifetime with your companion soul mate if you haven't met your twin soul. However, when the twin soul is found, the companion soul mate relationship could suffer. When this happens, the companion soul mate relationship is generally short-lived or, if it continues, a non-satisfying one. However, this is no reason to jump ship when it happens. Remember, there is a reason your companion soul mate is in your life (for example, so you can raise children together).
When your twin soul comes into your life and you are in a companion soul mate relationship, it is important that you take things slowly. It may be that the companion soul mate relationship will come to an end - or it may not. One thing you must keep in mind is that ending an existing relationship solely because one feels one has found one's twin soul is never a good idea, because over time you will realize that both associations are meant to be and both have an important role in your life.
An interesting aspect of the companion soul mate relationship is that we put more of our energies into it. The karmic soul mate relationship tends to go at an easy pace, without much effort from either partner, as it does with twin souls. The companion soul mate bond requires more work on our parts to sustain a healthy, loving atmosphere.
This is the highest form of soul mate connection. Your twin soul is your other half; to find your twin soul is like finding yourself. We go through our life searching and searching, and what we don't realize is that we are looking for someone just like us. Sometimes, we find them in this life and, other times, in other lives.
I believe they are always around, but for some reason it is not apparent. Perhaps we close our eyes to them. We don't listen and observe. We go through life at such a hectic pace we don't stop and take in things that would otherwise be apparent, so the presence of a soul mate could hit us flat in the face and we wouldn't even know it. This is sad, because we have missed that one, rare opportunity for total bliss and happiness.
IDENTIFYING A SOUL MATE RELATIONSHIP
In order to find your soul mate, you must know what to look for. I have compiled the ten most important traits in recognizing your soul mate. Read them to help you decide who your own soul mate(s) is.
Your soul mate must accept you for who you are. He or she must accept your weaknesses as well as your strengths. Your soul mate does not try to change you, nor do you try to change them. He or she lets you be yourself, for the more you are yourself, the stronger your bond with your soul mate has a chance of becoming.
Your soul mate makes you feel good about yourself. He or she never criticizes, only encourages. If they cannot do this, then they are not your soul mate.
Your soul mate cares about you and what happens to you. He is the first to be by your side in accomplishment and defeat. She picks you up when others throw you down. He nurtures your spirit so you can roll with the punches, no matter where they fall.
Your soul mate is your best friend in the entire world. She or he laughs with you, cries with you, sings with you. They are there for you when life throws you those bad curves; they are there for you when you surpass your highest expectations of yourself. A soul mate will understand you and give you what you want and need without hesitation. She will make you feel at home, comfortable and at ease.
As you would with any friend, take the relationship slow. Savor each milestone of firsts: the first time your eyes meet, the first time his lips brush against yours, the first afternoon spent together walking through the park or along the seashore or even just in your own backyard. You have to remember that if you end up together, these "firsts" will be ingrained in your memory forever. Cherish them.
Your soul mate is generous. He gives freely of his time and his possessions. She will ditch whatever she is doing to be with you. He will give you your heart's desires. She will give you her heart and soul, if need be.
Soul mates are interested in what each other have to say. My soul mate and I would spend hours contemplating the mysteries of the universe. Since we thought alike, we never did stop talking. We talked about our past, our present and our future. As we had so many things in common, each of us was interested in what the other had to say.
You may have premonitions of your future soul mate in dreams. Whether they are when you are asleep or when you are in meditation, you will picture your soul mate as if he or she were standing in front of you. You will note the color of their hair, the sound of their voice, their way of walking. You will picture your soul mate as you want them to be. If you are fortunate enough to be able to do this - and it can happen anytime, anywhere - remember it. For, in time, your soul mate will appear in front of you just as you envisioned.
One of the main ingredients for a successful soul mate relationship lies in the power of karma. In layman's terms, karma is basically the theory that whatever you do, there will be another event to follow that is directly consequential to your actions. Therefore, the law of karma teaches us that what we do today may come back to haunt us tomorrow. How does this apply to the soul mate phenomenon?
If you are in a bad relationship, and you continue to remain in that relationship, you are setting up a path of bad karma for yourself because of the negative energies that arise. Once you learn to set up a shield against this negativity, good karma will infiltrate your life and open your soul to a promising and healthy soul mate relationship.
Not until this happens will you ever receive a satisfactory soul mate union. Both parties must bring good karma into the relationship. You have to remember that we are all souls, just pure energy "visiting" this planet; and we have been here many times. Neither partner can come from a place where negativity is present, or the soul mate experience just won't occur..
You will feel a connection with your soul mate, as if you had known him or her before. You will feel an energy radiating between you. You will look into each other's eyes and see each other's soul, for that is where the true soul mate connection lies.
Not enough can be said about the spiritual connection between soul mates. It is the most important quality in a soul mate relationship. You will feel this in the depths of your heart and soul. Without it, the soul mate relationship is doomed.
Your soul mate will love you more than anything or anyone he has loved in his entire life, although he will give you freedom to be who you are. "You cannot possess a soul mate any more than you can possess a person in your physical world," says Robert Egby, author of Thank You For The Flowers. "Soul mates are free and must always be so. Love cannot be possessed or controlled. Soul mates are together because they share an unconditional love, a mutual vibration. There are no exceptions."
Other things come into play in seeking your soul mate that you might not count on. One is perfect timing. If it isn't the right time for you and your soul mate to be together, it will likely not happen.
DO YOU ONLY HAVE ONE SOUL MATE?
I have learned in doing research for this book that many people do not believe in soul mates. They say they have searched and searched for the one person who will make them happy, and have given up. They have come to the conclusion they do not believe there is one, and only one, person who is perfect for them.
They are absolutely right. There is no one person who is your soul mate because, as I noted earlier, there are at least three types of soul mates. Those who do not believe at all are missing an important part of their life experience, for it is our search for our soul mate that makes our spiritual journey complete.
The bottom line is, don't give up. Our soul mates are out there. Perhaps, they are right under our noses and we don't even realize it.
Dorothy Thompson is the author of Romancing the Soul
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